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A Miscellany 240
Christian Album covers

by: JT

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A record store was advertising CDs for Christmas, and there was one, Harmony by The Priests (three actual Irish Catholic Priests), the cover of which immediately made me think: "That's South Park!" For those unfamiliar with episode 9 of season 7, Cartman decided to form a Christian Band so as to get a platinum record. The following scene is the shooting of the album cover.

[Some bluffs by a beach, dawn. Cartman, Token and Butters scramble over some boulders to get to the beach. Seagulls fly overhead]

Cartman: Almost there, you guys.
Butters: Ow...
Token: Why the hell did you tell us to dress nice to take us out here?
Cartman: Because, Token, we have to take pictures for our album cover. [sets up his camera on a tripod] The key to a hot-selling Christian album is a flashy inspirational album cover.
Butters: Wow, neato! An album cover! [walks out onto the sand]
Token: [follows Butters onto the sand] This Christian album better make as much money as you said it would, tubby!
Cartman: [when Token seems out of earshot] I'm going to kill you one day, Token.
Token: [spins around] What did you say?! [Cartman is startled]
Cartman: Nothing. All right, guys, stand over there and look wholesome and cool. I have a timer on this thing so I can get in the shot too. [begins to focus the shot. Butters and Token stand together]
Butters: Cheese!
Cartman: No no no! Haven't you guys ever seen an album cover? You're supposed to be standing in random places, looking away like you don't care! [Butters and Cartman move apart. Token moves off to a boulder a little farther away, Butters moves a bit closer to the camera]
Butters: Cheese!
Cartman: No! Butters, you can't look happy on the album cover! That's not cool!
Butters: Oh...
Cartman: Token, look away to the right. [Token looks off to the right] More. [Token turns his head to the right] More!
Token: [turns all his body to the right] Why the hell would I be looking way over there??
Cartman: So it looks like you're too cool to care that you're on an album cover...

It looks to me that The Priests did a better job of following Cartman's instructions for the design of their Christian album cover than did Cartman's group.

The Priests - three guys too cool to care that they are on an album coverFaith+1