We are all prophets now.
by: John Tyrrell
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King Abdullah bin Abdulaziz of Saudi Arabia has called for the United Nations to support blasphemy laws which would criminalise anti-religious speech.
It is our duty and that of every Muslim to protect Islam and defend the prophets.
I demand a UN resolution that condemns any country or group that insults religions and prophets.
We can only hope that western countries hold firm in defence of free speech and recognize that criticism of religion and any religion's promoters, living or deceased, is a legitimate exercise of free speech.
However, as the special legal protection demanded by King Abdullah extends to prophets, I see no reason that protection should not apply to every member of this church.
Accordingly, exercising my powers as Patriarch of the Church, I hereby declare that effective immediately all followers of Apathetic Agnosticism are prophets.
Please use your new powers wisely. No calling out the bears on little children. And no forecasting of apocalypses.
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