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Meditation 976
End Times Prediction Agreement

by: Will Petillo

You may print this form for distribution to any of your friends / acquaintances who have bought into Mayan End Times. With slight amendments, you can use it for other End Times prophecies.

Your thoughts on this Meditation are welcome. Please use the contact page to provide your comments for publication.

End Times Prediction Agreement

            I, ___________________________ swear that I truly and honestly believe that the world will end on December 21, 2012, subject to the following conditions:

  1. The end-times may come in the form of a natural disaster, nuclear warfare, alien invasion, pandemic, sudden mass-enlightenment, or in any other form subject to the below conditions.

  2. The end must clearly occur on the above mentioned date for my belief to be verified.  A gradual transition or minor event exemplifying a general “worsening” of the “political or religious landscape” will not constitute verification.

  3. The moment in which the world as we know it terminates must occur on December 21, 2012, at any time of day, as measured by any of the standard time zones.

  4. If the End as described in sections 1-2 above does not occur on the date described in 3 above, then I hereby promise that I will henceforth declare the following:
    1. That I forever renounce all belief in any and all Mayan-calendar-based end-of-the-world claims.
    2. That I will recognize that countless End-times predictions have been made before this one and that every single one of them has been proven false.
    3. That I will henceforth view with extreme skepticism any and all end-times predications of any sort, regardless of how convincing I consider the source or justification.
    4. That I will admit to having been wrong and that I have made an entirely foreseeable and grossly unreasonable error in judgment.
    5. That I will expend at least as much effort in teaching myself how to think critically as I have previously spent believing in, encouraging others to believe in, and preparing for the End times of 2012.

  5. In return for the above-mentioned promises, I accept as fair and equitable consideration the right to state, without reservation, that I truly and honestly believe that the world will end on December 21, 2012, and to be able to cite my willingness to agree to the terms of this contract, which will be kept on public record until the end of time (whenever that may be) as evidence of my (justified or misguided) sincerity.

  6. As further consideration, in the event that the End occurs on the above-specified date, I may say “I told you so” in any manner most emotionally satisfying to myself to all nonbelievers at any available opportunity and they will have no recourse save    expressions of embarrassment.  Likewise, if I am wrong, nonbelievers may exercise the same privilege against me.

Signed,  _________________, on this _____ day of _________, 2012.