God is in the Genes
An article in the New Scientist suggests that genes may determine how religious a person is. It has been assumed that religious behaviour was the product of socialisation, but a new study on twins who were raised apart suggests that genes contribute about 40% of the variability in a person's religiousness.
Christian leaders were quick to respond, and following are several reports received over our newswires:
The Vatican: Friday, 18 March 2005
In a dramatic change of policy, the Vatican has announced that therapeutic abortion is now acceptable in those cases where the fetus carries the dreaded atheism or agnosticism gene.
"Until now," stated Vatican spokesman, Cardinal Letame di Cavallo, "we have regarded all fetuses as little gifts from God, and nothing should be allowed to interfere with their opportunity to grow up to become good Catholic boys and girls and be of service to their parish priests."
"But now we realize that those genetically predestined to disbelief are no more than spawn of the devil. Accordingly, in a new form of exorcism developed specifically to deal with this issue, these godless creatures can be surgically removed from their mothers wombs, and their tiny bodies burned at the stake."
Pat Roberston and Pastor George Pferddung of Back Swamp, North Carolina discussed this on the 700 Club. Following is a transcript of that discussion:
Virginia Beach, VA ,18 March 2005
Pastor Pferddung: You and I both know, Pat, that the Pope is the Scarlet Woman, and the Vatican Curia is the agent of the Anti-Christ
Pat Robertson: Amen
Pastor Pferddung: But even a stopped clock is right three times a day.
Pat Robertson: Amen
Pastor Pferddung: Well perhaps it's four times - or maybe only once. That doesn't matter. What does matter is that the Vatican has it right this time.
Pat Robertson: You are so right, George. We have an epidemic of godlessness in this country - no - an epidemic of godlessness in this entire world, and it has to be stamped out. And the ability to eliminate these heathens before they are born, it's a gift from God.
Pastor Pferddung: Hallelujah, Pat, Hallelujah.
Pat Robertson: Let us just get the words correct. This is not abortion. That is still against God's law. This is religious cleansing.
Pastor Pferddung: Amen, Pat. Those words remove any lingering doubt as to the rightness of this procedure.
Focus on the Family then made its position clear.
Colorado Springs, CO Friday 18 March 2005
James Dobson's Focus on the Family organization made clear their discontent with the policy on godless fetuses announced by the Vatican today.
The Press Officer for Focus on the Family, James Hestgjødsel stated: "Dr. Dobson is disturbed by this new policy from the Catholic Church, even though Pat Robertson, with whom we normally agree, has supported it."
"These people just do not understand the affect a godless child has on a family. Such a child actually makes the other family members think for themselves in an attempt to justify their faith. It is so wrong that the essential family dynamic be disturbed by intelligent thought."
Hestgjødsel explained, "That is why the Vatican policy is faulty. The termination of non-believing fetuses is optional under their policy. That is not good enough. Dr. Dobson has obtained the support of 171 Republican Senators and Congressmen to sponsor a Constitutional amendment requiring that all pregnant women be screened, and all fetuses containing the atheism gene or the closely related agnosticism gene will be mandatorily excised."
"Dr. Dobson told me this morning," Hestgjødsel went on to say, "that only by absolutely requiring full compliance can we protect the Christian United States, the 10 Commandments in all courthouses and schoolrooms, and God in his proper place in the Pledge of Allegiance. Too long has the community of the faithless denied our God-given freedom of religion by interferring with our right to impose our views on everyone."
- NewScientist.com news service, 16 March 2005
- For the credulous amongst you, Paragraph 1 is fact. The remainder is fiction in which names, characters and incidents either are products of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events or locales or persons, living or dead is entirely coincidental.